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Mindful Living
Conscious Breathing
Listening to the Bell
Waking up in the Morning
Walking Meditation
Sitting Meditation
Eating in Mindfulness
Sangha Body
Taking Refuges
Noble Silence
Dharma Talks
Dharma Discussion
Living Together
Beginning Anew
Taking Care of Our Anger
Working Meditation
Lazy Day
Practicing Verses
Five Mindfulness Practice
Fourteen Mindfulness Practice
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Sharing on the Children’s Program |
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during the Family Retreat (July 1-4, 2006)This year’s family retreat was a very joyful and healing four days. Between July 1st and 4th, 300 people attended, our biggest retreat ever without Thay here. There were 60 children and 80 teens, and adults from all over California, and many parts of the country. Although some of us monastics were quite anxious about receiving so many guests at once, we were all very happy at how well things flowed, and how inspiring the retreat was. After everyone settled into their dorms or tents on Saturday afternoon, we opened the retreat with orientation to the practice that evening. The Children’s program staff took the children up to the small meditation hall, but we ended up holding our orientation outside on the road. We sat down, invited the bell and asked the children to observe how many in and out breaths they breathed with each sound. Everyone was quiet, listening to our breath, to the birds, as we watched the fading sunlight change the colors of the mountains surrounding us. I felt the calm settle on us, and I was so happy to see the relaxed and inquisitive young faces, with eyes closed in concentration, or looking around in appreciation. We spoke about the sacredness of the meditation hall, a place where we go to be our best self, to be calm and collected. And how we respect this space by removing our shoes and bowing when we enter, and treating things in the hall with care and gratitude. When we got to the hall, some fifty-plus children entered so mindfully, bowing to the Buddha and taking a cushion in the circle. We went around and each child shared his or her name and favorite summer activity. We got into pairs and made a nametag for our partner. Children wore their gift nametags proudly for the next 4 days. Then Br. Phap Ho led the children in slow walking meditation around the circle, aware of the left foot, and the right foot, paying attention to our in and out breath, enjoying the coolness of the tile floor. To end our first evening, Bobbie, our friend and ranger from Utah, read us a beautiful story, Children of the Earth, about how we can protect Mother Earth. Over the next three days, we met in four different age groups. The children learned to invite the mini-bell for each other to breathe, we did Chi Gong together, we practiced snack meditation-- looking deeply into our cookies, fruit, and juice to see where it came from, what elements made it possible, and appreciating their preciousness. We went on a hike up the mountain with the whole Sangha to have breakfast. We made beautiful found-art cards for our parents, glueing bark, coffee beans, leaves, flowers, tin foil, etc. into unique and lovely creations to offer to parents the next day. We learned the practice of Total Relaxation, lying down and relaxing the different parts of our bodies, ending with beautiful lullabyes. One evening we went for a walk down the main road. As dusk fell, Joe Reilly, our Cherokee musician friend from Michigan, lead us in a Native American round dance with his hand drum. Many children, circling, circling, feet beating out the drums’ rhythm, in tune with the mountain and the sky. On Monday afternoon, parents and children gathered to practice Beginning Anew, a time of expressing gratitude and appreciation, as well as our regrets, and what we want to do to bring more happiness to each other. Parents brought things from nature to offer their children that represented qualities they loved in them. The sharings were from the heart, sincere and profound. Children were shy, but felt safe enough to express openly their love and how they wanted to offer more patience, calm, and support to their parents. Some were very concrete—one girl promised to listen more when her mom was talking with her, another to look into herself to see why she was irritable rather than taking it out on her parents and sibling. Parents also shared openly, not afraid to be vulnerable, to acknowledge their shortcomings, and it was very healing. Tears and laughter both were welcome and respected. A father apologized for his habit of interrupting his son and committed to listening to everything his son had to say before jumping in. A mother shared that she wanted to take more time with her kids and not rush so much. To wake up earlier so that she would be more relaxed and less stressed in starting the day. We ended the ceremony with hugging meditation, not the usual, quick squeeze and pat on the back, but a mindful embrace. On the first in and out breath, we are aware that we ourselves are still alive. On the second in and out breath, we are aware that the person in our arms is still alive. On the third in and out breath, we are aware that we are still together in this precious present moment. It was exquisitely beautiful to observe families holding each other so tenderly and to receive heartfelt hugs from the children. The children also learned many songs and we had an opportunity to perform a play and a song during the Rose Festival on Monday evening, a festival honoring our father and mother. The play was about a young girl and her village in India, who protected her tree friends from wood-cutters by hugging them. We learned about the Two Promises, the mindfulness trainings for children: Although the heat was sweltering at times, loving young people set up a lemonade/ice-cream stand near the garden to refresh the Sangha as well as raise money for our humanitarian projects in Vietnam, feeding poor children and supporting teachers, preschools, elderly, etc. Children joined their parents and the whole sangha eating delicious vegetarian meals in children’s joyful semi-silence. Our last activity of the retreat was a discussion and role play on dealing with difficult emotions. We asked the children to speak about fear, what made them scared and how they dealt with it. Some spontaneously added their experience with loneliness. Then they shared about their anger, what they did when they got angry, how they knew they were angry, what physical signals they noticed—like tense shoulders, a knot in the belly, faster breathing. In pairs they got up in front of everyone to act out scenarios of dealing with anger mindfully, to protect our own and others’ happiness and safety. They praticed stopping and recognizing their anger: “Breathing in, I know I’m angry. Breathing out, I turn away from the situation or person making me angry.” They practiced breathing and walking mindfully, or sharing with someone else to help calm down. The children were creative, funny, and very good actors! We ended singing and dancing to Joe Reilly’s Robot song, a funny, silly song, pretending to be robots. And lastly, a big, group hug, and a bow to express our gratitude to each other for the wonderful time together. The retreat nourished all of us deeply. Some monastics shared it was over too fast, and they missed the sounds and activity of all the children and young people. We will be very happy to see you again next year! By Sr. Jewel A mother and daughters’ impressions of the 2006 Family RetreatJuly 20th, 2006 From Sharon: “Just Walking”13 July, 2006
Peace, Dear friends, we would love to hear your experiences from the family or teen retreat! Please email them to Sr. Jewel at deerparkmonastery@yahoo.com
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